VOLUME 1 ISSUE 1                                                                                 UP DATED  April 1, 2008                                                                        Weather: Mostly all day

Community Section

Monsanto wins “Best corporate neighbor” award in Red Bluff, California

Shasta, CA—Citizens of Red Bluff, a sprawling Northern California metropolis of roughly 13,000 people, recently selected Monsanto Company as their new “Best Corporate Neighbor” of 2007, a distinction shared by ExxonMobile, DynCorp, Halliburton, and Starbucks, just to name the most recent selectees. 

“Monsanto Company, like Dyncorp, Lockheed Martin, and Dow Chemical before them have really given Red Bluff a warm embrace this year, and has, like BlackWater Securities, ITT, and Chevron, been such a wonderful member of our community.” 

Sandy Kooch of Tehema County, which is California’s largest producer of Plums, Walnuts, Olives, and various other agricultural goods, who has been the Chair of the selection committee for over 22 years, discussed with us the criteria for nomination.  “Corporations, like Phillip Morris, Pfizer, and Nestlé USA,” Kooch says “are the model, generally, of just the kind of corporation that embodies the qualities of a good, benevolent neighbor.  Just like any good neighbor, corporations who want to make our list have to be kind, active in the community, good to their significant others, and keep their yards, as it were, neat and clean, like Nike, Coca-Cola, and Clear Channel.” 

Monsanto representative Mike Treakle accepted the award on behalf of the Corporation, which consisted of a $25 dollar gift certificate to Lariat Bowling and the traditional “key” to the city, which can be traded for two passes to the State Theatre. 

Mr. Treakle, speaking at the ceremony held in the city park, situated by the scenic Sacramento River (near the swings), expressed his thanks and gratitude to the fine city of Red Bluff, located in the middle of hundreds of square miles of various orchards, farms, and fields in California’s scenic northern valley area. 

“Red Bluffans, for the past two weeks you have been reading about the good news Monsanto got.  And today Monsanto, like Wal-Mart, Eastman Kodak, and Archer Daniels Midland, considers itself the luckiest corporation on the face of this earth. We have been in Red Bluff for years and have never received anything but kindness and encouragement from you citizens.”  

Kooch, when asked about possible nominees for next year’s award, cryptically hinted that Citigroup, McDonalds, and Occidental Petroleum just “might” be looking good, but that Bechtel’s recent work in developing nations seemed rather “neighborly.” Indeed.